In general, I am considered a rather friendly extrovert with a wide range of things that I can talk to people about. Even still, I had a hard time conjuring up the energy to carry on a conversation with people much of the time. I'm not sure if it's just a matter of chemistry - certain people have a personality or energy that I am comfortable with, or a matter of desire, some people make the journey enjoyable and others that make every question a Herculean style effort. It's not unique, many people vary in their styles of communication, but it does leave me to wonder why I can be so selective. There is no inherent bias, there are just some people I just won't take time to get to know. How much of an extrovert can I be if it is only in certain environments? Perhaps I am an introvert with an attitude? It makes me wonder because I don't like the feeling inside that I might be dismissive..... I tend to live my life as a come what may, all experiences have something to offer us all. Setting people aside (if that is indeed the action) provides me the capacity to miss out on something potentially awesome for laziness/ annoyance/ inability to find a common ground.
It's funny, when I was a homebound hermit, there were none of these issues, but a desire to actually meet and interact with others. It's such an awkward balance - be alone, interact partially or throw oneself to the winds and be a 'people person'. Perhaps it is merely an internal demand due to my extremist nature, or perhaps it is based in my human nature. Whatever the cause, the outcome makes me feel pathetic at times.
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